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Have You Ever Met A Person That Can Kill A Stick Of Chapstick

Come meet me faggots. I’m that guy. Am I immortal? Kinda, there are multiple records of me finishing a stick of chapstick without losing it.

I was so lazy about buying a new stick on my last chapstick, that I scraped out the unroll-outable with a pencil to use it. Literally, no chap left in the stick, not even the last remains that wont roll out.

For all you HR people out there (I am 100% certain no one reading this is trusted with hiring people), if you came across someone that put this on their resume, would you second guess tossing my application in the trash? That’s what I thought.

I’m a fucking God.

 

 

Here you go, as promised:

Here’s a reward for all you dirty dogs out there who made it through this whole blog.

 

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